Articles tagged ‘irish joke’
Irish Joke of the day - Lucky pig
By Seán | September 10th, 2007 |
1 Comment »
One day an American tourist walked into an Irish pub somewhere in County Roscommon. Strangely enough, under the American’s arm was a healthy, Irish pig.
“If you don’t mind me askin,” says the bartender, “Where’d you get that animal from?”
“I won him in a raffle,” says the pig.
Irish Joke of the day - A bull of a problem
By Seán | September 3rd, 2007 | Add a Comment »
Three Irish bulls were chatting with each other about rumours they had heard about their farmer bringing a new bull to the farm.
The eldest of the three had been on the farm for 10 years. Pawing the ground and snorting, he said,
“I’ve been here the longest and I have a hundred cows in my pasture. [...]
Irish joke of the day - Top 15 Signs you’ve been in Athlone too long
By Seán | August 27th, 2007 | 1 Comment »
Inspired by last week’s post on signs you’ve been in your Irish town too long, I’ve made a list up for Athlone. Additional suggestions are welcome! Enjoy:
The Top 15 Signs you’ve been in Athlone too long
15. You’re annoyed when travel guides describe Athlone as being “west of Dublin.”
14. You know what “bog hole jumping” is.
13. [...]
Irish Joke of the day - Signs you’ve been in your Irish town too long
By Seán | August 20th, 2007 | Add a Comment »
I thought this deserved re-posting but, unfortunately, I have no idea who wrote it originally. Reading it though, I’ll have to make one up for Athlone. Maybe next week . . .
SIGNS YOU’VE BEEN IN CORK TOO LONG
1. You say “I’m Grand, like” all the time.
2. You think Murphy’s is ’savage’.
3. You think of [...]
Irish Joke of the day - Irish veterinarian
By Seán | August 13th, 2007 | Add a Comment »
One day a woman who owned a pet duck awoke to find her beloved animal lying still upon the floor. Deeply concerned, she rushed him to the local veterinarian, who was known to be a grumpy and contrary man.
The vet asked her to put her duck upon the examination table and prodded the waterfowl a [...]
Irish Joke of the day - Top 10 signs you’re being stalked by a Leprechaun
By Seán | August 6th, 2007 | Add a Comment »
The top 10 signs you’re being stalked by a leprechaun:
10. Generic-looking green transit van with darkened windows parked across the road with “I brake for imps” bumper sticker.
9. Every time you stop on the street the pitter-pattering stops and that green fire hydrant seems to have moved a little closer.
8. All your shoes have been [...]
Irish Joke of the day - Diplomacy
By Seán | July 30th, 2007 | Add a Comment »
It is said that the definition of Irish diplomacy is the ability to tell a man to go to Hell in such a way that he’ll be looking forward to the trip.
Irish Joke of the day - The collision
By Seán | July 2nd, 2007 | Add a Comment »
One night on the small, dark Irish country roads an Englishman and an Irishman were driving recklessly and collided, demolishing both of their cars. Amazingly, the two men emerged from the wreck unscathed. Astonished by their luck, both agree to put aside their dislike of each other from that moment forward.
The Irishman at this point [...]
Irish Joke of the day - 10 pints of Guinness
By Seán | June 24th, 2007 | Add a Comment »
A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, “I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. I’ll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back.”
The room is quiet, and no one takes up the [...]
Irish Joke of the Day - Magical Lift
By Seán | June 17th, 2007 | Add a Comment »
An Irish family from the country made their first visit into Dublin City. The girl and her mother went into the clothing shops while the husband and son continued to explore. They came to a lift (that’s anglo for “elevator”), a device they had never seen before. They were mystified, watching lights flicker above the [...]
